Sometimes I've been guilty of it.
We see an individual and assess their gifts, talents, skills, etc and "place" them in our mind. Or, we watch them in action and determine that he/she needs to be "placed" differently than they are.
But, instead of talking about it openly, or, perhaps investing in them to grow them into where we thought they don't fit, we begin to offer passive suggestions and comments. We slowly push them where WE think they should be.
I've done this, and am not proud of it.
The more I understand my role as a leader in the church (which is another discussion altogether - the current view of what leadership is and isn't), the more I realize that my primary job is listening for the direction of the Holy Spirit and then, openly and honestly, acting on His direction.
Is subtlety sometimes necessary? Yes, but only at His direction. We are to apt to be manipulative and I've rarely, if ever, seen that work.
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